Found this on the internet one day.

Are we really that stupid?

In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods:

On Sears hair dryer:
Do not use while sleeping.
(But if you were sleeping, how would you know?)

On a bag of Chips:
You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
(OK, I'll just open them...)

On a bar of Dial soap:
Directions: Use like regular soap.
(How else do you use soap?)

On some Swanson frozen dinners:
Serving suggestions: Defrost.r
(And nobody new that, right)

Printed on the bottom of Tesco Tiramisuan> dessert:
Do not turn upside down.
(To late!)

On Marks and Spencer Bread Pudding:
Product will be hot after heating.
(I sure hope so)

On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
Do not iron clothes on body.
(Someone has actually done this???)

On Boot's Children's Cough Medicine:
Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication.
(It's illegal for children to drive, isn't it?)

On Nytol Sleep Aid:
Warning: May cause drowsiness.
(If it doesn't I'm getting my money back)

On most brands of Christmas lights:
For indoor or outdoor use only.
(Were else would I put them? In the pool??)

On a Japanese food processor:
Not to be used for the other use.
(The other use is?)

On Sainsbury's peanuts:
Warning: Contains nuts.
(Well that is good)

On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
Instructions: open packet, eat nuts.
(Simply Stating what everyone should already know)

On a child's Superman costume:
Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.
(Oh, and people thought it did)

On a Swedish chain saw:
Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals.
(Someone has tried that! Owch!)

On a toboggan:
Beware: Sledge may develop high speed under certain snow conditions.
(That is what they are disinged to do)

On a knife sharpener:
Caution: knives are sharp.
(why else did I buy them)

On shin pads for cyclists:
Shin guards cannot protect any part of the body they do not cover.
(Who thought no-one new that?)

On a take away coffee cup:
Caution: Hot beverages are hot.
(Nice piece of information, that one)

Emergency safety procedures at a US summer camp:
In case of flood, proceed uphill. In case of flash flood proceed uphill quickly.
(Well what else would you be doing? sitting down?)

In a microwave oven manual:
Do not use for drying pets.
(I sure hope not)

On the back of a pilot's seat in a Nato aircraft:
Seat must be facing forward for take-off and landing.
(Ummm... this has put me of flying)

On the bottom of a cola bottle:
Do not open here.
(Does anyone read the bottom of the bottle?)

On a Harry Potter wizards broom:
This broom does not actually fly.
(Boo Hoo!)

On a box of aspirin:
Do not take if allergic to aspirin.
(You would have it if you were)

On a bottle of laundry detergent:
Remove clothing before distributing in washing machine
(Well isn't that what washes the clothes?)

On a muffin packet:
Remove wrapper, open mouth, insert muffin, eat.
(How big was this muffin?)

In a kettle instruction manual:
The appliance is switched on by setting the 'ON/OFF' button to the 'ON' position.
(Really, I thought it was the other way round)

On a ketchup bottle:
Instructions: Put on food.
(No, I use it as glue...)

On a bottle of rum:
Open bottle before drinking.
(Good idea)

A car park sign:
Entrance only. Do not enter.
(Where else do I get in then!)

A sign in a street in Hong Kong:
Beware of people.
(Quick a person, RUN!)

Rules on a tram in Prague:
Beware! To touch these wires is instant death. Anyone found doing so will be persecuted.
(If I'm dead I don't really care)

Sign on newly-renovated ramp entrance, USA:
Take care: new non-slip surface.
(Oh dear! It's to sticky!)

On a can of air freshener:
For use by trained personnel only.
(But they don't give you there phone number???)

On a bottle of baby lotion:r
Keep away from children.
(Well this is useless)

On a pair of socks bought in egypt:
Do not wash.
(Great I dry clean my socks anyway)

On a 500-piece jigsaw puzzle:
Some assembly required.
(Since when has no one known that?)

On a can of pepper spray used for self defense:
May irritate eyes.
(That is why I brought the stuff!)

On a Frisbee:
Warning: may contain small parts.
(Since when?)

In a car handbook:
In order to get out of car, open door, get out lock doors, and then close doors.
(Gee, that is helpful)

On a packet of cashew nut pieces:
Warning: This product may contain residue of nuts.
(Hopefully it contains nuts as well)

Directions for mosquito repellent:
Replacing battery: replace old battery with a new one.
(Yay! I never would have guessed!)

On a birthday card for a one year old:
Not suitable for children aged under 36 months or less.
(Well that card will sell really fast)

In a hotel bedroom:
Please do not turn on TV except when in use.
(Why else would we turn it on?)

In a lift in a Japanese hotel:
Push this button in case anything happens.
(Like, what?)

On a toilet cleaning brush:
Do not use orally.
(EWE!)

On a can of Spray paint:
Do not spray in your face.
(Well if you didn't no that, you know it now)

On a TV remote:
Not Dishwasher safe.
(What do people put in dishwashers?)

On a blowtorch:
Not used for drying hair.
(No, not a good idea)

On a washing machine inn a launderette:
No small children.
(Someone did this to their children???)

On a bottle of hair dye:
Do not use as Ice Cream topping.
(Speachless, someone thought it would taste good???)

On a push along lawn mower:
Not to be used as a hedge trimmer.
(Lol, some one tried that???)

On a box of fireworks:
Do not put in mouth.
(Hmmm, they do look tasty, don't they)

On the packaging for a wrist watch:
Warning this is not underwear! Do not attempt to put in pants.
(Does nobody know the meaning of wrist anymore?)

In a dishwasher manual:
Do not allow children to play in dishwasher.
(Children can fit in dishwashers really well, can't they)

On a toaster:
Do not use underwater.
(Bread gets soggy when wet, everyone knows that)

On a mattress:
Do not attempt to swallow.
(Yum! A huge Marshmellow!)

The Spell checker is not working and has mucked this up...
So any mistakes are not my fault